Stillness

In Ann Voskamp’s study guide waymaker she uses an acronym — SACRED. S is for Stillness to Know God. On page 27 of her study guide, Ann writes the following.

“Right now is a chance to quiet your soul, to stop striving or hiding, to let yourself be found in relationship to where God is, right here. Be still and let God find you, like He found the Israelites on the edge of the Red Sea. The obstacle will be the miracle. Be still and be here, right here with God.”

What is the Red Sea, the seemingly insurmountable, uncrossable, too hard to circumvent obstacle in your way today?

As I was still before and with God, this is what I wrote as His letter to me. As you read it, take time to to be still and consider what He has to say to you.

My beloved, precious child, Let go. Let me work for you, in you, through you. Remember the words of my son Jesus in John 12:24. A seed kernel, buried in the soil, is broken and dies to produce much more life. So it is with you. Allow me to show you and guide you in this process. Lean into me. I know life can be hard. Weep with me for what is lost. Your tears water the seed. Hope with me for what is to come — rebirth, renewal, new life, new harvest. Embrace the rhythms and seasons of life. Each one passes and I am in them all. I am with you. Allow me to be your strength, your wisdom. I am holding you, sustaining you. Weeping, letting go, rejoicing, growing, taking hold, being still — I do life, all of it, with you. We are together always for I am with you always (Matthew 28:20).   Love eternally, God

Expectations

This summer one of my spiritual goals is to complete Ann Voskamp’s devotional study entitled Waymaker: finding the way to the life you’ve always dreamed of.  The next few blog posts will often include thoughts, ideas, and truths that I am processing as a result of this study.

June 14th 2022 (the last full moon before the summer solstice)

Sometimes it is easier for me to flee emotionally and attempt to hide what is in my mind and heart. Yet, Ann Voskamp reminds me this only causes agitation of my soul. I need to be still, to feel, to not hide, to not cover, to not flee. I need to be still. BE STILL. AND know God’s everlasting, rejoicing, healing, compassionate love. For me. For ME!

He seeks me out. He pursues me. He, the one who created me and communes with my innermost being, already knows my deepest longings, emotions, and thoughts. He invites me to recognize them, name them, and give them to him, so that he can heal and I can be whole. AGAIN.

Brokenness and healing. This pattern plays out in all our lives. Ann says, “It is not the hard roads that slay us. What actually slays us is the expectation that this road isn’t what we hoped it would be.” And so striving begins.

Be still. (Psalm 46:10)

The Joy, the Sorrow

5:45 AM    May 7, 2022

My beloved is off to work. I sit on the porch swing sipping a steaming cup of coffee as tears trickle down my cheeks. I consider all I will miss leaving my current employment. Yet, I know transitioning to my new job is the right thing for me to do. I remind myself that the right thing is not always the easy thing.

This transition and loss remind me of the many transitions and losses in my life that I did not take the time to fully grieve. It was “easier” on my emotional self to be excited about the new to come, the change. Looking back, I realize this only compounds grief in the future and leaves behind fractured pieces.

Most times I make a significant change like this,  I move to a new home, a new state, or even to a new country. I say goodbye to my friends, familiar neighborhood, stores, market, neighbors, streets, post office, medical caregivers, parks, trails, playgrounds, church family, mom/ladies groups, etc. Sometimes I even say goodbye to currency, language, manner of dress, culture, nonverbal ways of communication, modes of transportation, forms of worship, and more.

This time I am privileged to keep most of these, or at least I can access them with minimal effort. Nevertheless, it is still change! So, I grieve the losses of the present while looking ahead to the possibilities of the future. It is a bittersweet moment in my life story.

Today I take some time to recognize there is room for the bittersweet. I welcome both the joy and the sorrow.  They are partners in life. For, we cannot truly partake of one without having tasted the other. My mind honors and my heart affirms my mixed emotions. Each is valid. A feeling to be acknowledged.

And my heart mends — as it has been healing over the years. Bit by broken bit. The joy and the sorrow and everything in between and beyond form a beautiful mosaic of empathy, compassionate kindness, steadfast strength, awareness, clarity, fearless courage, perseverance, wisdom, and brave authenticity.

Those who genuinely see and truly know me perceive that I am formidably gorgeous! I am restored from broken. A vessel of Light and Love that reflects the Healer!

by Jené Conklin

Do Not Be Afraid

Do Not Be Afraid

Do not be afraid.
Not of the past
Not of the present
Not of the future

Do not be afraid.
Of what has been.
Of what is
Of what will be.

Do not be afraid
Do not “what if”
Do not “if only”
Do not despair

Fear not
For I am with you
Trust me
I do life with you

Do not be afraid.

by Jené Conklin

December 2021

The Joy of Christmas

“great joy for all people”

Joy is a deep peace in knowing that I am cherished and cared for by the Eternal One, the Creator who gives and sustains all life. It is hopeful anticipation that things will get better and work out – even if that is outside of linear time and our mortal bodies. Joy sustains in the Valley of the Shadow of Death. Joy, Hope, and Peace bring us through the trials and tribulations of life. Without them, we might despair.

The Joy of Christmas, the Christ child, shines with the hope of deliverance. We hope for what the Child came from – Heaven, no tears, no pain, no sadness. Yet he flipped the grid and, for a time, accepted pain, tears, grief, and sorrow that He might bring us Hope, grant us the Peace that passes understanding, and sustain us with abiding Joy.

The simple words “Thank you” are not enough, and they are everything. Thanks, praise, and honor to Him who does for us what we could never do for ourselves!

SILENCE

 

Recently our church has been participating in a sermon series entitled Emotionally Healthy Spirituality (EHS).  It is an 8-week series that we are also studying in our small group.  One theme that has stood out to me over the course of this study is the necessity to practice rest, Sabbath, and time each day and each week to be still and connect with God and our inner self. When we practice rest, we slow down. We can then focus on the goodness and blessings in life, rather than the trials and tribulations that come our way.  The author, Peter Scazzero, quotes Wayne Muller: “Sabbath requires surrender. . . If we refuse rest until we are finished, we will never rest until we die. . . Sabbath says, Be still. Stop. There is no rush to get to the end, because we are never finished.” ( EHS Day by Day p. 128)

I admit it is tempting to do, do, do. Always. Yet there is so much truth in the fact that we never finish doing. There is always something more to be accomplished, completed, conquered. Yet, renewal and inspiration come in the moments and hours of rest, of Sabbath. We need to get away from doing and we need to be in the moment. We need to recognize and even embrace our limitations. Resting from work, whether scheduled, unscheduled, paid, or unpaid, helps us regain proper perspective and refocus on what is truly important. Times of rest and Sabbath sustain us in the busy times of having to do.

I recently had covid and was “out” for most of the month of October as this virus assaulted my system just as I was recovering from another infirmity. I was so exhausted and had so little energy that I planned my excursions from my chair and my bed. If I needed something from the back laundry room fridge, I planned to get it when the laundry needed transferring to the dryer. If I had to go upstairs, I knew that one trip would decimate me. I scaled that mountain as little as possible.  Being so sick, caused me to take a look at my priorities and what was truly important for me to accomplish. It helped me consider my limitations. and allowed me more time for unplanned rest and extended Sabbath. I spent time thanking God for many things in my life, including that I was still at home and not in the hospital, that I had loved ones to help me, who cared, and who prayed for me.

When it comes down to it, rest and Sabbath help us “slow down and take a longer view of our lives” (p. 126). It helps us focus beyond the present moment, the urgent circumstance. It helps us practice for eternity.  I need to remember that rest is the balance of work, not the opposite of work. We all need balance in our lives. How are you balancing your time and building times of rest into your busy life?

 

Looking to the Mountains (Psalm 121:1-2)

Where is your focus, your focal point?

 

The Endless Mountains of Pennsylvania have such beautiful sunsets (and sunrises)! I am blessed in that my kitchen window faces West (and my morning commute takes me East). As a result, in the fall months, I experience the majestic variety of our mountain sunsets and sunrises. Each one is unique. Some display vibrant colors while others are muted with tones of gray. Some days, they are hidden by a storm.

Yet each one draws my eyes to the mountains and beyond. “I lift up my eyes” to the mountains, to the sky, to “the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth” who painted the sky just for this moment, for my pleasure.

And I am grateful

For beauty,

For eyes to see,

For silent moments of reverence and appreciation.

And I am grateful

That my focus can be drawn beyond the mountain,

That the mountain is not seen as an obstacle to obscure the beauty but rather contributes to it,

That the mountain enables me to see, believe, hope for what is beyond.

And I am grateful

That sunrise and sunset are part of the rhythm of life,

That these two – the rising and the setting – connect me to the Maker,

That they are a reminder to me of God’s faithfulness and presence every day in my life. The Lord does life with me and meets me where I am –

On days that I show up and shine vibrantly,

On days when I feel muted gray and overwhelmed with the burdens of life,

On stormy days when peace seems elusive.

And I am thankful

That God does life with me – every day,

That the Lord sustains me,

That the Maker created beauty in the sunrise and the sunset for me to focus, if only for a few moments, on what is beyond.

“I lift up my eyes to the mountains” and remember that my help comes from “the Maker of heaven and earth!” The Creator of all who helps me! For it is in sunrise and sunset I can experience the calming, healing, and restorative power of the Maker’s creative nature as I take time to be still, soak in the beauty, and reconnect and dialog with the Divine.

 

 

 

Intentional G.R.I.T. for 2021

Intentional G.R.I.T. for 2021

2020 is drawing to an end. Finally! Yet, what will the new year bring?

As I have been somewhat snowed in the last few days, I have taken time for reflection on the calamity of these past few months and the collective consternation caused by COVID-19 and its cooperative (or uncooperative) comrades (such as quarantine, social distancing, remote and hybrid teaching/learning), and all that ensues.

I have decided that this is not the year of excellence. It is the year of accepting that good enough is just that — good enough. It is the year of adaptability, innovation, and creativity. It is the year of survival.

It is a time to recognize that it is also the year of adaptability, innovation, and creativity for others. For others, it is also the year of survival, and sometimes hopelessness.

With these things in mind, I have come up with a way to keep myself on track for 2021 since we all know that it will begin the same way as this year ended. I will remember G.R.I.T.

G

I am God’s good woman who has been granted great grace. Hence, I will graciously grant grace to others when it is needed and appropriate.

I will practice generosity with kindness as well as with my time and resources.

I will promote growth in others (and myself) and will remember that true greatness comes from within.

I will generate hope and light to those around me and gain an improved perspective when my own becomes skewed.

I will pray for a greater ability to grasp the magnitude of God’s love, grace, and power, thus giving Him greater glory and praise. 

R

I will strive to maintain realistic expectations and perspective and will recognize the gifts, talents, and work of others. 

I will recognize the warning signs that tell me that I need to reflect, reconsider, regroup, renew, and rest.

I will remember to curate, create, and share resources.

I will adjust to life’s rhythm in a way that is comfortable for me and reflects my character.

I will realize that I am not alone and will remember that mistakes yield learning and learning produces growth.

I

I will live with integrity and be trustworthy.

I will invite collaboration, initiate change by leading from the middle, and inspire others to greatness.

I will integrate music and movement into my life daily.

I will balance intellect with wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and experience.

I will care for my innermost being with TAWG (time alone with God), reflection, rest, and recreation.

T

I will trust that potential obstacles are truly growth opportunities.

I will be teachable and tune into constructive criticism producing reflection and transformation.

I will take note of the beauty around me (hopefully every day).

I will make time with those I love a priority.

I will treasure what I have received and will be thankful.

 

How will you tackle the new year? I would love to read your comments.

Musings of a Commuter – Fall

Fall

The morning fog enshrouds the Endless Mountains. It drapes along the ridges like a grandmother’s shawl drawn about her shoulders against the chilled morning air.  Mother Earth is preparing for the arrival of Grandfather Winter. The dawn’s sun struggles to dispel the clouds which surround me and enfold me in their dewy moisture. As I drive over the bridge, I see the fog rising in a whimsical slow dance from the Susquehanna River.  Every day the same commute, yet every day the scenery displays somewhat differently. It is Fall.

Fall is the season of the dancing leaves. Leaves, once green, are now a bold symphony ablaze with color — radiant reds, bright yellows, vivid oranges, golden browns, dappled greens.  So much beauty! The winter wind whispers to them tantalizingly then teasingly whisks them from their branches. I delight in their swish as I walk through the painted patchwork quilt they create as they drift down, dancing and whirling, to the ground. They indulge the senses — delightful to the eyes,  crisp and smooth to the touch, fresh earthy scent, lovely swishy-swish, music to the feet.

Fall has so many blessings!

The corn matures and dries.  The stalks rise high and point to heaven. The ears, plump and golden, are ready for harvest.

The sunflowers in the field stretch high and higher raising their heads to praise their Maker.  Eventually, they become so heavy with seeds that though the stalks still stand straight and tall, the heads of the flowers bend gracefully down. Weighted with wholesomeness, they are ready for harvest.

Fall gardens yield produce and the Farmers Market fills with yellow mums, orange pumpkins, plump squash, and crisp apples.

Fall means campfires, warm days, cool nights. The warm sunshine and cooling breezes promote sweatshirts and shorts on the same day.  Fall heralds the last of summer activities and clear starry nights to observe the Milky Way and its myriad of constellations. Fall brings festivals and celebrations.

Fall is the epitome of promises fulfilled, the hope of harvest, gathering of family and friends for celebration, and anticipation of new things to come.

In the months of Fall, it is my favorite season.